You Tell Me

On a sunny Saturday morning after the blizzard, I listened, cell phone to ear, as a client recounted her recent “adventures”. Saturday being “phone call day”, I was sitting in “my office” (car parked at the flat spot on top of a hill–the only spot for ANY cell phone reception–half a mile from the cabin in Concho, AZ). Being blessed (I use that word with some ambivalence here) with the ability to multi task, I was also recharging the phone through the car battery.

The sky was SO blue, the air SO clean, my heart and mind so quietly content as I sat in the warm cozy comfort of the little Toyota I fondly refer to as Hot Red. As the call was wrapping up I became aware that an hour had passed AND that the headlights were still on. Oops.

Just before the conversation ended, I decided to turn on the motor in preparation for heading back to the cabin.

“tdk”, and then SILENCE. No rocket scientist needed here—the battery was DEAD. I drive with the lights on as supportive gesture to safety on the road AND it now was clearly evident that I had not turned them off when I parked. Tdk…………………….tdk………………….

I calmly (truly) got off the call and sat there looking out over the blue and white that lay in front of me. Options. I had options. Could walk two miles back to the main house and ask for help—it was the weekend, their time off and alone—it just didn’t seem right; could walk down 20 feet to the roadside and wave down the next cute engine with jumper cables.

Given that only 1 car had passed in the last forty-five minutes, I contemplated pushing Hot Red out of the rapidly forming and abundant adobe mud (there is a reason that adobe was the building material of choice here in the SW for thousands of years), over the cattle guard AND then roll it down the ramp to the main drag, hoping against all hope to startle it into a rebirth. One can dream.

I got out of the car, walked across the cattle guard and stood there. I was in NO hurry. That is one of the nicest things about living out in the middle of nowhere. It becomes patently clear (very quickly) that there is just no point. There are no TV’s, strip malls, or multiple choices of toothpaste to distract one from the business of living.

Looking up and down the road, I took in the rolling hills and valleys through which the road passed. Not a car in sight. I walked back across the cattle guard, completely unperturbed, rather enjoying myself in the sunshine actually.

Got back into the car, sat there, turned over the engine and as one would expect, …tck…………..Nada.

Got out, walked around and opened up the hood so I could look at that seemingly defunct “heart of the matter”. Something to the effect, “well, what would you do if it were a person?” crossed my mind. Having dealt with “persons” before, that thought provoking question gave a nice little twist to the situation. The immediate thought was, “Love it”. And I say, “Why not?”

What needs to be conveyed and clearly understood here, is that I HAD ABSOLUTELYY NO ATTACHEMENT to what was happening, (after all, I did have the back up of humbly walking down to “the ranch”), it WAS an utterly gorgeous day, I WAS warm, relaxed (beyond belief—again, living quietly in the high desert has major stress reduction benefits), AND, I LOVE a good jaunt into the unknown.

Standing there with my hands kind of cupped over the little, somewhat forlorn looking battery, I have no recollection that I THOUGHT anything, just felt immeasurable peace and an all pervading sense of contentment. And, I mean what was the hurry?

After a bit of time, I shut the hood, got back in behind the driver’s seat, turned the key, “Brrrrmmmmmmm”!

Hot Red rolled smoothly out of the mud, over the cattle guard, down the ramp and into a 4 hour drive to Holbrook, Snowflake and Heber, “just in case”!

As I left, one part of me thought, “Well, of course! Why shouldn’t human beings be capable of such things?” The other part of me was “Holy …..! Did you SEE what just happened?!?!!!???” The ravens overhead just laughed and soared on the air currents as the engine purred happily down the road.

© 2008 Emily A. Easton

Yesterday, as Gypsy ran ahead of me, she noticed something moving along a distant fence. Barking loudly with a warning note of alarm in my direction, she circled in on the intruder, moving in and then retreating several times without altering her cautionary tone. The interloper was a large garbage bag caught in the barb wire billowing darkly in the morning breeze!

Calling her back, I let Gypsy know that it was “all ok” and she seemed to understand that having done “her job”, she was now free to move on.

I had to laugh as she wove in and out and around this “unknown” that loomed before her, while giving her full attention to defending against it. AND, it was a PLASTIC BAG!!!! You know where I am going with this don’t you! : ]

How often do we make “mountains out of mole hills”, bags blowing in the wind into immediate dangers, unknowns in our future into GREAT BIG “holy terrors”? Often is my experience.

Like Gypsy did with me when I called her to me, it’s a great idea to call on a friend, a coach, someone you trust, to run by them the fear or worry that seems too big and scary to handle alone. Often, it is only a plastic bag blowing in the wind.

And if it isn’t, brainstorming, inspiration and support can be found in that connection with a friend or a coach, that allows you to take care of the situation while you are taking care of yourself.

Blessings from the field! Emily
© 2010 Emily A. Easton

This morning, Bendito, (“Little Blessing”) was with great dedication and enthusiasm, attacking his image in the mirror. He would stalk up to the reflection, pounce at it, draw back and then have another go with the same intensity as the first assault!

(And yes, I “adopted” the kitten..it was a slippery slope of no return on Monday morning when I started thinking of names for the little guy! Feral cat my foot; he knew a good home when he saw it!)

As I watched this exuberant display of stalk and attack, it struck me–isn’t that what we often do, attacking with a vengeance the very person who needs our love the most? Ourselves!

Bendito is playing, delighting in “the chase” of his “phantom” self. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could all give chase to the wonder and beauty that is shining back at us each time we “catch” our reflection?

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Walking in the fields this past Wednesday morning with Gypsy, I was once again stunned at the beauty of the western version of the thistle that grows up to 4 feet tall in the hay fields and is prolific in the feathery pincushions of mauve that sit atop each bristled stem.

My mother’s favorite flower was the thistle, the eastern version that grew in rare beauty around the meadows of my Maine childhood. If one was spotted, it required a stopping of the car or a stepping off the path to take in the delicate lavender while being alert to avoid its sharp barbs.

It struck me as I gazed into one purple face, that the thistle is so characteristic of my mother—an immense beauty surrounded by and protected by a piercing sharpness that was to be avoided at all costs. It took diligence, alertness, and a tough skin to be in the presence of the beauty that was my mother’s talent, love of Nature , keen mind and resplendent sense of humor. How startling to understand now, the significance of her choice in favorite flower! The thistle and she were perfect reflections!

I walked through the field and saw the thistles shining brightly in all their splendor and pondered what flower I would choose as a favorite, that others might say, “Oh, that____is so like you, Emily”.

Columbine, asters, roses, anything periwinkle blue, Jill of the Pulpit!…the list goes on…so many beautiful flowers!

As I write this, it occurs to me that maybe like many of us, I am more a bouquet than a single flower! What are your favorite flowers and what can they reflect back to you of your uniqueness, beauty and wonder? And, yes, it’s o.k. to acknowledge the barbs!

May this season of flowers reflect back much beauty! Many blessings, Emily

© 2010 Emily A. Easton

I ignore the counter space!

That being my “dominant” hand, this break has put the kibosh on several basic activities—try flossing for instance with you thumb in a splint…or typing with that same splint wanting to get in the way every time you go to hit the “l” and get an extra “m” along with it…to say nothing of applying eyeliner!!! NOT happening! : }

These of course, are minor hindrances in the grand scheme of things and yet it does make one need to call on inner resources of patience, letting go and the releasing of any perfectionist tendencies that one might have hidden away and that are now rearing up demanding that dishes be done and teeth be “properly” brushed (for heaven’s sake)!

It has been a blessing (yes, in disguise!) to see where I still hold myself in disregard. If anyone else had broken THEIR thumb on THEIR dominant hand, I would, with great kindness and generosity of spirit, encouraged them to be patient and gentle with themselves. None of this perfectionist task master stuff anywhere in sight.

So why is it that when it is ourselves, we are so harsh to judge and hold ourselves to task, when what we really need is just a little tender love for ourselves?

I ignore the desk area!

I don’t know WHY. I do know that it is not only possible, it is necessary for health and well-being to treat ourselves with the same love and respect, the same patient attention and the same gentle kindness that we would our dearest friend or a small child who comes to us in pain. We would just do it without a second thought!

And, yes, I did go back and take out allm the extra “m’s” (almmost!).

Have a blessed week breathing in gentle loving kindness for your precious self! Emily

PS–It is also worthy to honor all the positives that come out of this kind of  situation–for one thing my left hand is getting some much needed use adn becoming quite dexterous!

© 2010 Emily A. Easton

Years ago, I told a friend that when I figured out “this money thing” I would probably ascend! Life has been very good and generous to me in many ways, being blessed with good health, wonderful family and friends, creative endeavors satisfied…AND, a steady, positive growth in the area of MONEY has eluded me. In part, it is a familial “thing”—creativity and often brilliance in the face of it all while WITHOUT the accompanying accumulation of wealth.

There have been many ebbs and flows in the area of finances. When life is changing, moving into something new, often (I have noticed) the old begins to fall away before the new arrives. Which has left me “hanging” on more than one occasion.

So, recently, after a whirlwind of two shows, a couple presentations and prep for a workshop, all of which received “critical acclaim” if not financial, I noticed a creeping fear of, “what in the heck am I doing?” making its way into my psyche! Yech!

What usually happens with me at such times, is the gut starts clenching up, the self-judgments of the “what is the matter with ME?” variety start shouting, the fringes of red (in my mind anyway) panic start crawling into place and then its a painful ride into FEAR…Ever experienced any of THAT?

This morning, I woke up to the beginnings of all of the above, when I said to myself, “Self…wait just a “cotton picking moment” here!” Just like that, that is what I said. It occurred to me as insane as it might be, WHAT IF I just RELAXED MY BELLY?!?!?!?

Novel, I know. Scary in the “let go”? Definitely! Helpful? Beyond belief!

It took me a few conscious attempts at it as I made my way through walking the dog, doing qi gong, feeding the kitten and then it began to feel REALLY GOOD to do this RELAXING! (and for those of you who know me–yes, there is a kitten in the house—where did he come from and WHAT is he doing here??? HE is looking for a good home!)

The relaxing of the belly took enough attention and effort that I wasn’t any longer focusing on the mind rantings or the fear…I was and still am as I sit here typing, actually enjoying myself and this beautiful day.

Suddenly, whole new possibilities began opening up for me—a sense of well-being, a renewed knowing that the Universe and I are in alignment and that “this too shall pass” into what is to come, began to replace the prior mindset!

In the seemingly simply “relaxing of the belly”, I am, in this very moment, OK with the unsettling aspects of being self-employed with its ebbs and flows; I am realigned with deep FAITH and TRUST; I am open to NEW POSSIBILITIES—ALL due to letting my belly hang loose and relaxed! WOW! Try it; you might like it! : )

Blessings, Emily

© 2010 Emily A. Easton



Sitting in tall grass as the sun comes up and the half moon sets over The Sleeping Ute Mountains is Heaven. Wandering with Gypsy through the fields of grass and wildflowers at dawn while the deer sneak past her radar nose is pure Delight!

The flip side, if there is one, is that I am alone. (It’s like the expression about being your own boss—the upside is that you are your own boss and due to human nature, so is the downside!).

The other morning I awoke with a “behind the scenes” whisper of doubt. Doubt?!? Yes, a creeping sensation of, do I dare say it, inadequacy. WHAT!?!? For months, I have been centered, steady, present in the moment, loving Life. WHAT WAS THIS??!?!

I IMMEDIATELY called a dear friend (and a wonderful coach) on the East Coast (THANK GOD FOR TECHNOLOGY!!!!) and left a “PLEASE CALL ME BACK ASAP” message. You know the kind. : )

Then I gave myself a pep talk in the mirror! Remember last week’s post? : ) (Also, if you haven’t already done so, go to “Extras” and check out “Jessica’s Affirmations”!). Cheering myself on in the mirror helped, and even though the nagging continued, it did not stop me from putting one foot in front of the other, “showing up” and getting done what was needed.

It just didn’t FEEL GREAT! Am finally learning at this juncture in Life that discomfort is NOT the same as inappropriate! So, I kept going, slogging through and getting IT done.

When my friend (and coach!) got back with me, just having a conversation with her made me feel better! I realized that sometimes, especially when we are NOT surrounded by like minded others, or when those around us are caught up in a paradigm of frantically dashing here and running there, it is VERY easy to lose sight of our inner sanctuary and our inner knowing.

We NEED each other to mirror back our inner truth. We NEED this! It is NOT optional for most of us; especially as women, we generally NEED to “talk it out”. (An FYI–This is one of the primary benefits of having a good Life Coach—someone to MIRROR BACK our truth!!!).

The conversation revealed that Life IS good, that I AM being and doing what I need and want, AND that, “Yup!” (to quote E. Tolle) “…it’s a mad, mad world” and therefore must not be taken personally as Don Miguel Ruiz has suggested in his, “The Four Agreements”.

The thing that struck me afterwards is that for months before moving “out here”, I had been making regular deposits of love and affection into the bank account of personal well-being. Connection, hugs, laughter and delight filled my “in town” Life.

All that changed when I came here to write and create show material. I didn’t even notice for a month or so as the Well-Being Bank Account of my Life began to run low. I see now that, especially when changes take place in our lives, it is important as with any bank account, to keep tabs on this particular balance and to make timely deposits. It is a sound investment!

SO, when you feel out of sorts, find a friend, call a coach, sit and chat! Talk it out! Work it through!And find how quickly you are once more enjoying life and glad to be alive! Those deposits into your Well-Being Account of Life really do pay off.

Many Blessings of Well-Being and Joy! Emily

© 2010 Emily A. Easton

Louise mentioned how challenging it is for people to do this simple exercise—to look into the mirror and say in the same way one would to a dearly beloved child or friend, “I LOVE YOU”. Of course, I gave it a go and at the time, there definitely was a certain amount of resistance to being TRULY loving toward MYSELF. Could say it to others; MYSELF was a whole other matter.

Over the years, following Ms. Hays’ good words, I slowly let it become a habit of delight! When passing any reflection of myself, I now give a cheerful, “Em, I just love you SO much!” or something of that nature. It FEELS good. It gives me, especially when I am alone, a reflection back of someone who REALLY DOES believe in me, thinks and SAYS that, “Yes, You Will Make It!” “Yes, Things will get better!” “Yes, Life IS good! AND, getting better every moment!” “Yes, You are worth it!” “Yes, You ARE enough right here and right now!” That’s what I get when I look in the mirror now.

What about you? Are you with loving kindness able to SEE yourself in a positive light? Are you able to look through your eyes with the same respect and delight that would be expressed to another dearly beloved?

If so, MAGNIFICENT! And if not, why not start today with just a little wink or nod in front of the mirror! Send a quick glance of Love toward the incredible being who stands before you in all its physical, mental, emotional and spiritual complexity and glory! The fact that we even exist at all is a MIRACLE! Why not experience the Wonder! Look in that mirror, get a GOOD look and say, “I LOVE YOU!” And then be prepared for a healthy feeling of well-being to come flooding in!

Have a week filled with beautiful reflections! Emily

PS–Again, check out Jessica’s affirmations under “Extras” for some really GREAT Mirror Talk!  Also, it’s good to remember that what we see in another we would not see if it weren’t in ourselves also!

©2010 Emily A. Easton

Recently, I had begun feeling the need for the companionship, physical contact and intimacy of a daily life shared. Of course, as any full blooded, die hard romantic would do, I contemplated where I was going to MEET SOMEONE here, where the land is VERY BIG and the people far and few between!

Then suddenly it seemed that “everyone” around me was getting a DOG, which led to walks with friends’ dogs, visits by friends with dogs, well meaning bystanders suggesting dogs. Dogs, dogs, dogs…everywhere I looked!

OK, OK. So I dragged myself reluctantly to the Animal Shelter solely for a “look see”. I did the walk through. Nothing more. No pitter-patter of “YES, this is THE ONE”. Whew…ok, then. A few days later I with some resistance went again. Again, whew…no pressure there. I did this three or four times over the next couple weeks.

I even bought some of those green dog chews shaped like little bones while in the Dollar Store and kept them on the kitchen shelf, as a timid gesture back at the Universe that I MIGHT be warming to the idea, when in fact it was a RELATIONSHIP that I was looking for, for God’s Sake, not the care of a pet!!!!

Then one afternoon on the way home from town, while not even intending to go to the “pound”, something said that I had better. I was by now on a first name basis with everyone there. Greetings were exchanged and I was left to wander through the kennels on my own.

Off I went and there she was…just arrived and one mass of trembling terror at where she found herself. Otherwise, healthy, young and clear eyed. No collar, though along with having been spade, she seemed to have not been starved nor basic needs neglected.

For a nominal fee, she came to me, after being held for 10 days, “just in case” the previous owners would claim her. They didn’t, so I did.

I now live with a year old, heeler/beagle mix of delight. She is adorable, curious, all body wagging joyful on long walks and endlessly affectionate in a gentle, cheerful manner.

The other night, as I climbed the stairs for bed, with Gypsy right behind me, I was struck by the wonder of it all—affection is being exchanged, walks through pastures and on mesas taken together, fierce loyalty and that peace that comes when “someone has my back”.

A friend had asked me what I wanted in a a dog before I had gotten Gypsy and I had said I wanted a dog who appreciates me, is a good companion, is loyal, who delights in Life, and who brings humor and laughter into the day. She laughed and said, “That’s what you want in a partner, too…you ought to write that down!”

Sometimes we think and are SO set on a “something/someone” that we miss the beauty, wonder and perfection of what we are given. As I climbed the stairs, I marveled that what I need right now is wrapped in the coat of a thirty pound dog named, Gypsy.

That is not to say that down the road I won’t be given another package in a different wrapping! : ) May the gifts you receive be delightfully wrapped, Emily

PS—If you want a great “pick me up”,

check out, “Jessica’s Daily Affirmations” under “Extras”!

© 2010 Emily A. Easton

What one dreams of in 100F heat!

The other day, I picked up a book in a second hand store written by someone I had known years before. The book itself had been written over twenty years ago. Wondering what he was up to today, I “googled” him and found that his school was still going strong and that 18 books were credited to his name!

Now I don’t know what you would do in receiving this information. I took it personally! (The temperature was over 100º F that day, so I give myself some slack here)!

Yes, I started down the road of comparison. The book I was reading indicated someone “very together” twenty years ago. A published author no less. And then, of course, “there was me”. Where else could this go but there? : )

With the sweltering heat and aloneness of the day, I fell directly into the pity pot. What had I done? What had I accomplished? It was truly PITIFUL!

I am living in an old house in the hay fields of SW Colorado. It does not even know what AC is. As I moved miserably through the day, two things struck me. One was the fact that I had been “fighting” the heat, moaning and groaning about it as if it were a personal affront to my being. I had not found even an iota of peace or acceptance in it.

I laughed out loud when I realized how I was carrying on as if the Universe had decided that yes, in fact, it was going to make Emily Easton miserable today by making it THIS HOT!

The minute this awareness struck, everything changed. I noticed that by NOT fighting it, the temperature seemed to drop a couple degrees; maybe I moved slower. It definitely took less energy just relaxing into that heat.  AND, I wasn’t FIGHTING it anymore. It just was. Acceptance! Wow! What a concept!

The next thing that happened was a sequitur to this. I suddenly realized that the raging comparisons with my former associate really meant that I was NOT ACCEPTING my own life. I was comparing, judging and attempting to comprehend a mystery, the mystery of our unique lives and paths, as if I could dissect and label the directions each had taken into an understanding. A huge wave of relief flooded through me as I asked myself what Brugh Joy used to wonder, “Who am I to judge my own being?”

And dreams some more!

We each live the lives we live. They are uniquely ours. No one else’s.

And as Brugh Joy also said, “Make no comparisons. Make no judgments. And, delete your need to understand.”

Life IS a Mystery after all!

May you find serenity in the acceptance of “what is” in every situation you find yourself.

Many Blessings, Emily

PS–Please check out the “Analogy for Life Coaching” in the side bar that is one of the best I have heard!

Hard as I might, I could not come up with a focus for a post, so I let it be. I surrendered. All I could do was keep pace with what was in front of me to do.

Then in the last couple days, three things happened that inspired awe and wonder in this Life that is in and all around us! And bingo! Here I am back writing again! : )

First, on Monday morning, I was “in town” to meet with a couple people for sample sessions. After completing that, I drove down Main Street and by the Methodist Thrift store. As I passed, it was as if the “Voice of God” said, “Emily, turn in here now”. Which of course I did. My experience says it is best to follow that Flow.

I went in, walked directly to the back of the store where the “long” clothes are, and hanging right up front for all to see was a periwinkle blue, never worn, LLBean, just my size, fleece robe! I took it off the rack, walked to the front of the store and paid $1.25 plus tax : ) for it! My kind of shopping!!!

What you also have to understand is that periwinkle blue is the ULTIMATE color to put on this body of mine; fleece is SO comforting to wear, wrapping me in reminiscence of Mom holding me when I REALLY needed it; AND it was EXACTLY my size with a “petite” aspect to it that accommodates a very short waist!

The next day, I went to the local health food store. Its glassed-in foyer had both doors wide open. I noticed that a hummingbird had gone through those open doors, gotten confused with all the glass and couldn’t find its way out. I walked over to where it was frantically going up and down a window and as someone inside the store later said in a stunned voice, I “caught it in mid air”, took it outside and to its immense relief, let it go. The point is I wasn’t even thinking about anything; it just happened. Have you ever held a hummingbird? That IS a small wonder!

We have had a lot of wind blowing massive amounts of dust and dirt around for several weeks. Then in just the last couple days, the winds have quieted, the dust has settled and the dirt has gone back to where it belongs on the ground. Last evening, it sprinkled and left great big “splots” on my very red car to the point where it was difficult to see out the heretofore simply dust covered windows. I made a vow to myself as I went to bed that I would wash AT LEAST the windows in the morning.

When I got up at around six, the world felt clean and fresh. The air sparkled. Covering my car was a droplet filled layer of dew! Dew rarely if ever happens around here in the high desert and mesa country that I live in. AND, there it was covering everything!

Being from Maine where practicality is almost a religion, I grabbed a couple rags and dashed outside in my wonderful new LLBean, periwinkle blue, fleece and “size appropriate” robe while the hummingbirds dashed and dove around the feeders on the porch and, I wiped my car CLEAN!!!!

Small wonders, momentary miracles…may your days be filled with them! Many Blessings, Emily