You Tell Me

Hello Everyone! Since I am still unable to type with any speed or accuracy, due to the thumb accident of a few weeks ago, I am posting an experience that happened back in early months of 2008. It is a little long, so get a cup of tea and settle into a comfy chair ad enjoy! Would love to hear your thoughts on this one! : ) Many Blessings, Emily

You Tell Me

On a sunny Saturday morning after the blizzard, I listened, cell phone to ear, as a client recounted her recent “adventures”. Saturday being “phone call day”, I was sitting in “my office” (car parked at the flat spot on top of a hill–the only spot for ANY cell phone reception–half a mile from the cabin in Concho, AZ). Being blessed (I use that word with some ambivalence here) with the ability to multi task, I was also recharging the phone through the car battery.

The sky was SO blue, the air SO clean, my heart and mind so quietly content as I sat in the warm cozy comfort of the little Toyota I fondly refer to as Hot Red. As the call was wrapping up I became aware that an hour had passed AND that the headlights were still on. Oops.

Just before the conversation ended, I decided to turn on the motor in preparation for heading back to the cabin.

“tdk”, and then SILENCE. No rocket scientist needed here—the battery was DEAD. I drive with the lights on as supportive gesture to safety on the road AND it now was clearly evident that I had not turned them off when I parked. Tdk…………………….tdk………………….

I calmly (truly) got off the call and sat there looking out over the blue and white that lay in front of me. Options. I had options. Could walk two miles back to the main house and ask for help—it was the weekend, their time off and alone—it just didn’t seem right; could walk down 20 feet to the roadside and wave down the next cute engine with jumper cables.

Given that only 1 car had passed in the last forty-five minutes, I contemplated pushing Hot Red out of the rapidly forming and abundant adobe mud (there is a reason that adobe was the building material of choice here in the SW for thousands of years), over the cattle guard AND then roll it down the ramp to the main drag, hoping against all hope to startle it into a rebirth. One can dream.

I got out of the car, walked across the cattle guard and stood there. I was in NO hurry. That is one of the nicest things about living out in the middle of nowhere. It becomes patently clear (very quickly) that there is just no point. There are no TV’s, strip malls, or multiple choices of toothpaste to distract one from the business of living.

Looking up and down the road, I took in the rolling hills and valleys through which the road passed. Not a car in sight. I walked back across the cattle guard, completely unperturbed, rather enjoying myself in the sunshine actually.

Got back into the car, sat there, turned over the engine and as one would expect, …tck…………..Nada.

Got out, walked around and opened up the hood so I could look at that seemingly defunct “heart of the matter”. Something to the effect, “well, what would you do if it were a person?” crossed my mind. Having dealt with “persons” before, that thought provoking question gave a nice little twist to the situation. The immediate thought was, “Love it”. And I say, “Why not?”

What needs to be conveyed and clearly understood here, is that I HAD ABSOLUTELYY NO ATTACHEMENT to what was happening, (after all, I did have the back up of humbly walking down to “the ranch”), it WAS an utterly gorgeous day, I WAS warm, relaxed (beyond belief—again, living quietly in the high desert has major stress reduction benefits), AND, I LOVE a good jaunt into the unknown.

Standing there with my hands kind of cupped over the little, somewhat forlorn looking battery, I have no recollection that I THOUGHT anything, just felt immeasurable peace and an all pervading sense of contentment. And, I mean what was the hurry?

After a bit of time, I shut the hood, got back in behind the driver’s seat, turned the key, “Brrrrmmmmmmm”!

Hot Red rolled smoothly out of the mud, over the cattle guard, down the ramp and into a 4 hour drive to Holbrook, Snowflake and Heber, “just in case”!

As I left, one part of me thought, “Well, of course! Why shouldn’t human beings be capable of such things?” The other part of me was “Holy …..! Did you SEE what just happened?!?!!!???” The ravens overhead just laughed and soared on the air currents as the engine purred happily down the road.

© 2008 Emily A. Easton

Black Bag of Unhappiness

Yesterday, as Gypsy ran ahead of me, she noticed something moving along a distant fence. Barking loudly with a warning note of alarm in my direction, she circled in on the intruder, moving in and then retreating several times without altering her cautionary tone. The interloper was a large garbage bag caught in the barb wire billowing darkly in the morning breeze!

Calling her back, I let Gypsy know that it was “all ok” and she seemed to understand that having done “her job”, she was now free to move on.

I had to laugh as she wove in and out and around this “unknown” that loomed before her, while giving her full attention to defending against it. AND, it was a PLASTIC BAG!!!! You know where I am going with this don’t you! : ]

How often do we make “mountains out of mole hills”, bags blowing in the wind into immediate dangers, unknowns in our future into GREAT BIG “holy terrors”? Often is my experience.

Like Gypsy did with me when I called her to me, it’s a great idea to call on a friend, a coach, someone you trust, to run by them the fear or worry that seems too big and scary to handle alone. Often, it is only a plastic bag blowing in the wind.

And if it isn’t, brainstorming, inspiration and support can be found in that connection with a friend or a coach, that allows you to take care of the situation while you are taking care of yourself.

Blessings from the field! Emily
© 2010 Emily A. Easton

More Reflections

Even though I discussed “Mirror Talk” back in June, I just have to share another story on it!

This morning, Bendito, (“Little Blessing”) was with great dedication and enthusiasm, attacking his image in the mirror. He would stalk up to the reflection, pounce at it, draw back and then have another go with the same intensity as the first assault!

(And yes, I “adopted” the kitten..it was a slippery slope of no return on Monday morning when I started thinking of names for the little guy! Feral cat my foot; he knew a good home when he saw it!)

As I watched this exuberant display of stalk and attack, it struck me–isn’t that what we often do, attacking with a vengeance the very person who needs our love the most? Ourselves!

Bendito is playing, delighting in “the chase” of his “phantom” self. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could all give chase to the wonder and beauty that is shining back at us each time we “catch” our reflection?

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Walking in the fields this past Wednesday morning with Gypsy, I was once again stunned at the beauty of the western version of the thistle that grows up to 4 feet tall in the hay fields and is prolific in the feathery pincushions of mauve that sit atop each bristled stem.

My mother’s favorite flower was the thistle, the eastern version that grew in rare beauty around the meadows of my Maine childhood. If one was spotted, it required a stopping of the car or a stepping off the path to take in the delicate lavender while being alert to avoid its sharp barbs.

It struck me as I gazed into one purple face, that the thistle is so characteristic of my mother—an immense beauty surrounded by and protected by a piercing sharpness that was to be avoided at all costs. It took diligence, alertness, and a tough skin to be in the presence of the beauty that was my mother’s talent, love of Nature , keen mind and resplendent sense of humor. How startling to understand now, the significance of her choice in favorite flower! The thistle and she were perfect reflections!

I walked through the field and saw the thistles shining brightly in all their splendor and pondered what flower I would choose as a favorite, that others might say, “Oh, that____is so like you, Emily”.

Columbine, asters, roses, anything periwinkle blue, Jill of the Pulpit!…the list goes on…so many beautiful flowers!

As I write this, it occurs to me that maybe like many of us, I am more a bouquet than a single flower! What are your favorite flowers and what can they reflect back to you of your uniqueness, beauty and wonder? And, yes, it’s o.k. to acknowledge the barbs!

May this season of flowers reflect back much beauty! Many blessings, Emily

© 2010 Emily A. Easton

Gentle Loving Kindness for Yourself is a MUST!

Ten days ago while mopping the kitchen floor, I slipped and broke my right thumb (thankfully, not something that happens often in my life!)

I ignore the counter space!

That being my “dominant” hand, this break has put the kibosh on several basic activities—try flossing for instance with you thumb in a splint…or typing with that same splint wanting to get in the way every time you go to hit the “l” and get an extra “m” along with it…to say nothing of applying eyeliner!!! NOT happening! : }

These of course, are minor hindrances in the grand scheme of things and yet it does make one need to call on inner resources of patience, letting go and the releasing of any perfectionist tendencies that one might have hidden away and that are now rearing up demanding that dishes be done and teeth be “properly” brushed (for heaven’s sake)!

It has been a blessing (yes, in disguise!) to see where I still hold myself in disregard. If anyone else had broken THEIR thumb on THEIR dominant hand, I would, with great kindness and generosity of spirit, encouraged them to be patient and gentle with themselves. None of this perfectionist task master stuff anywhere in sight.

So why is it that when it is ourselves, we are so harsh to judge and hold ourselves to task, when what we really need is just a little tender love for ourselves?

I ignore the desk area!

I don’t know WHY. I do know that it is not only possible, it is necessary for health and well-being to treat ourselves with the same love and respect, the same patient attention and the same gentle kindness that we would our dearest friend or a small child who comes to us in pain. We would just do it without a second thought!

And, yes, I did go back and take out allm the extra “m’s” (almmost!).

Have a blessed week breathing in gentle loving kindness for your precious self! Emily

PS–It is also worthy to honor all the positives that come out of this kind of  situation–for one thing my left hand is getting some much needed use adn becoming quite dexterous!

© 2010 Emily A. Easton

Relaxing Into Life…All of It!



Years ago, I told a friend that when I figured out “this money thing” I would probably ascend! Life has been very good and generous to me in many ways, being blessed with good health, wonderful family and friends, creative endeavors satisfied…AND, a steady, positive growth in the area of MONEY has eluded me. In part, it is a familial “thing”—creativity and often brilliance in the face of it all while WITHOUT the accompanying accumulation of wealth.

There have been many ebbs and flows in the area of finances. When life is changing, moving into something new, often (I have noticed) the old begins to fall away before the new arrives. Which has left me “hanging” on more than one occasion.

So, recently, after a whirlwind of two shows, a couple presentations and prep for a workshop, all of which received “critical acclaim” if not financial, I noticed a creeping fear of, “what in the heck am I doing?” making its way into my psyche! Yech!

What usually happens with me at such times, is the gut starts clenching up, the self-judgments of the “what is the matter with ME?” variety start shouting, the fringes of red (in my mind anyway) panic start crawling into place and then its a painful ride into FEAR…Ever experienced any of THAT?

This morning, I woke up to the beginnings of all of the above, when I said to myself, “Self…wait just a “cotton picking moment” here!” Just like that, that is what I said. It occurred to me as insane as it might be, WHAT IF I just RELAXED MY BELLY?!?!?!?

Novel, I know. Scary in the “let go”? Definitely! Helpful? Beyond belief!

It took me a few conscious attempts at it as I made my way through walking the dog, doing qi gong, feeding the kitten and then it began to feel REALLY GOOD to do this RELAXING! (and for those of you who know me–yes, there is a kitten in the house—where did he come from and WHAT is he doing here??? HE is looking for a good home!)

The relaxing of the belly took enough attention and effort that I wasn’t any longer focusing on the mind rantings or the fear…I was and still am as I sit here typing, actually enjoying myself and this beautiful day.

Suddenly, whole new possibilities began opening up for me—a sense of well-being, a renewed knowing that the Universe and I are in alignment and that “this too shall pass” into what is to come, began to replace the prior mindset!

In the seemingly simply “relaxing of the belly”, I am, in this very moment, OK with the unsettling aspects of being self-employed with its ebbs and flows; I am realigned with deep FAITH and TRUST; I am open to NEW POSSIBILITIES—ALL due to letting my belly hang loose and relaxed! WOW! Try it; you might like it! : )

Blessings, Emily

© 2010 Emily A. Easton